Should You Be An Open Book Or Stay Hidden?

That is the real question, isn't it. The one that we fight day in and day out. A personal battle that spans the decades of human life. We live with this uncertainty daily because of our social perceptions, we assume that we hide who we are to fit the mold. I know that I've said this before probably more times than I could possibly count.

Is it better to hide who you truly are or become an open book? Of those that you know who seem to lay it all out, do they still hide things? We all know that what we perceive Is not always what's true. "Believe half of what you see" does that ring any bells? behind a strong man/woman, there can be sadness. Behind a resting face can be suicidal thoughts. We do not know, truly the people around us. There is always, and I do mean always something that is hidden within us all whether it is a small secret or a list of items that we shy away.

I myself, have a hard time expressing who I truly am to people, I let people see the persona that I have created. In my persona, I've kept my values, morals, beliefs and I do not conform but the things that separate me from letting my animals out of the cage is my true feelings are kept inside. Maybe because I've always been there to be the shoulder to lean on, the good friend that wants to hear how hard your day was. I hardly discuss how I truly feel, in reality to anyone. That is my bad habit but its one that has kept me afloat until I've cracked. So do you really know the people around you?

What about yourself? How sure are you that the person you say you are is the one hiding poking his or her head out saying hi, screaming to be heard? I ask again, is it easier to stay shut or open up to the world. I used to believe that opening yourself and being a unique character was the answer but the more judgments and hate that is stirred daily. Wants me to yell and say "shut it down" Close up shop and just conform to the ways that society creates.
Social media trends have taken over lives, enough to blindside the world from the real issues that affect families daily, that affect mental health, that can affect anyone you see around you. We now more than ever are blind, blind to the realities of the changes that need to take place but are brushed aside and forgotten because we chose to let someone else deal with it. This gets us nowhere, the further down the line a problem goes the worst it's going to get. You wouldn't let your best friend stay mad at you. You would fix it. It's the same concept with these issues.

You may choose to be a closed book with who you are but be an open one with issues that you potentially have the power to change. You know the saying " One small thing" It makes a difference. We all have voices, let's make them heard. Don't shove the next issue under the rug, get it out, clean it up and Open up!
Swaying off topic is what I seem to do best, as a final note. If you see something say something, If you know someone who has ever made concerning comments about themselves, speak up, send them a text, it's not hard 2 seconds tops, let them know that you are here for them. I always wonder if someone would take the time to reach out to those that have suicidal or depression thoughts would the ratio of suicide deaths decrease??
Who knows, but take the time out of your day, if there is someone in your life that has been acting differently even in the slightest way send them a quick message. It couldn't hurt!

*Also featured on Maddietaylorknowslife.com*

Emotional instability or just human?

I have to question the things that I learn, if not that would borderline on boring. In Psy/310, the psychological testing movement is mentioned so I had the chance to research different test that researchers used in the 19th century and today. I found an online assessment of Robert Woodworth psychoneurotic Inventory, which measures emotional stability. Originally used to test soldiers from world war I for shell shock. I took the inventory and found that I scored 44 out of 116 with the normal range for a woman today being 39 but when the test first was administered the average for both men and woman was in the 20s. That had my gears grinding, are we really suffering more in the emotional sense than what we were back in the day? 

Then I sat and I came to the conclusion that yes, times are more demanding now, we are living a more fast-paced venture, we as humans are crueler, less compassionate and kind. Which can lead to more emotional traumas in our lives? Look at depression and suicide rates that have skyrocketed because societal views have had a drastic change, we no longer live in a kind and friendly environment but more like a hostile one where the rule book of kindness is thrown out the window. Yes, okay, You can speak your mind there is no crime against that, 21st century and all we have progressed but what have we really progressed to, our possibilities and extending a hand to those in need used to be endless but the selfishness that has derived again from the corrupt view of society has led humanity down a more hateful path. So yes, with much analysis it is now considered human to be emotionally unstable. After all, newer generations are not taught to have a backbone and to take a hit but to refer to the constant fight, If someone says something mean instead of standing your ground and having a conversation, many results to the physical violence, ending in more emotional trauma.

I believe that it is all in the way that we see ourselves and how others treat us, if we are taught to act a certain way, that is how we behave. A lot of parents do not realize children see and children do, they are impressionable. Parents are the teachers and leaving a mark on a child from your actions can lead them to be the opposite of what you have tried to teach. For example, if you tell your child that he or she should not fight, because it is wrong but you end up in a fight with someone over something petty. Your child's mind has erased what you have told them because what they see is what they do. That is without taking into account that when they are older their peers will be a big influence and peer pressure can win because as I just said, what they see is what they do and teenagers are natural rebels.

As humans have evolved we have gone from the stable class to the fast-paced unstable beings and that is okay, it's just a step up and a new thing to learn when to have emotions and when to turn the emotions off. Trauma is the main cause of emotional instability and it's imperative in the healing process that resilience is learned, in the resilience process a human who becomes devoid of all emotions can find themselves or an improved state of themselves. I want you all to know that there will always be tough times and the cycle will keep repeating because we are all hamsters on a wheel, constantly turning but after all the hardship and the trauma, you can land back on your feet. You can learn resilience you can break through and you can be human once more. Next time things go south and you feel like hope is lost remember that it is okay to be emotionally unstable because for humans that is the new normal.

Thanks, Maddie

Why Lie?

Yes, I know it seems like such an unrealistic question to ask in today's world, why lie? Why not speak the truth and see where honesty gets you. That's the philosophy that I was raised knowing, if you are honest you earn respect, there is no need to lie because one lie turns into two lies and the list goes on. The truth comes out eventually, a lie can't hold up forever.

I know that most of you are thinking "Well, lying spares feelings" okay yes it does but honesty also keeps you out of the doghouse. Think about it this way. Would you rather be hurt for a short time or be deceived time and time again? As humans we are resilient we overcome things daily. So, sticks and stones may break your bones but words should never hurt you. Lying to someone isn't just a word its a thing, a deceptive thing that happens to each of us daily whether we are the ones fibbing or someone else is lying to us.

Open your mind for a minute and really think about this. How many of our problems stem from lies? We were lied to and instead of moving on we stay mad. That in which we have every right to be mad cause we naturally assume that we would be told the truth especially by those closet to us. Lying and trust are two things that have a close-knit relationship. without trust, there is lying and in today's world, you have to assume that you can not trust anyone because they lie to you.

We can never really move past this deceit as it is programmed into humans DNA, NO!! back up there...... its a taught thing, we are taught that in certain circumstances that creating a white lie is appropriate and that stems and changes into " I didn't want to hurt their feelings" lying should mean hiding, you are hiding who you are truly are. You are shying away because some people are assholes that judge. That's another thing, often times people are twisting their self-image to match others in fear of rejection so they are lying about who they truly are. The more I type this, the more the reality is that the world is such a messed up the place that we'll never be able to speak the full truth because brutal honest comes without judgment or sudden conclusions about someone you don't know. Essentially judging a book by its cover. Looks shouldn't matter and over half of the time, the bully has more in common with the one they are bullying then the company they chose to keep.


Take a step back look around and reevaluate the company that you keep because deception lies in the hidden corners of our lives and you never know who might truly be lying to you.

Thank you.
Maddie